Tuesday, August 27, 2013

I'm A Bad Blogger

I've been a terrible blogger lately. Not that there's much to talk about in my life. I've been enjoying the rainy weather we've been having but not enjoying my husbands constant disdain for the weather we've been having. He wants so badly to go out on the boat but after the horrifying experience I had last year in the rain I never again want to venture out with clouds overhead.

So folks I'm here to say I'm alive but I don't have much else to say.

Tuesday, August 6, 2013

Free Writing #1

I thought I'd do something that I've been meaning to do for a while now. I'm going to free write here on this blog. I have a lot of thoughts going around in my head that I feel need to come out in order for me to move past them. This project, if you can call it a project, is simple. Write. Don't stop. Don't think. Just write. So here goes.

I called the pet cremation place today and they told me that my baby still isn't ready to come home. While I understand that he really needs to come home I feel like it's giving me time to grieve without staring at his little urn everyday. I almost hope it takes a little longer for him to come home. I'm still hurting over the decision to put him down though. Did I really do the right thing? It doesn't quite feel like I did. I also feel like I'm moving on too quickly. I understand I can't dwell on missing him forever, my other dogs need me, but I don't know what's appropriate. I feel like going out and having fun isn't the right thing to do but ... I'm kind of just writing in circles but I'm sure you get the point.

My husband is driving me insane. He's hell bent on taking the boat out to the lake when the chance of rain, and flash floods, and all kinds of earthly madness are too high for me to even think about going out on a floating vessel in possibly volatile water. He acts like it's the only thing we can do during the summer no matter how many times I tell him that there's more to summer than boating. We usually go to the lake 3 times a week (and I'm talking a 2 hour drive to the lake each way) and it gets old. I'd rather be doing something we don't normally do. He's stuck though. He thinks that if we don't use the boat that often there's no point in owning it. I know I talked about these past 2 points in previous posts but they're really what's on my mind right now.

Gosh what else. I haven't been feeling well lately and on top of that my foot is in almost constant pain for no apparent reason. Last Tuesday I was trying on a ton of shoes, because I need a new pair, and I woke up Wed morning with a horrible pain in my foot. It was almost to that point that I couldn't walk. It still hurts, almost a week later, and I don't know why. Admittedly it's not as bad as it was but I'm wondering if I shouldn't go see the doctor. I just absolutely hate doctors. My doctor is great but I hate seeing him. On top of that it takes weeks to get into see my Dr and by then the pain will probably be gone. That's honestly how I'm rationalizing not making an appointment.

Obamacare, you suck. I'm not quite sure why this is in my head right now but it is. Oh wait, I do know. Wasn't this whole bill supposed to make it more affordable for people to get healthcare? Yea, load of bullshit if you ask me. My father had to drop his health insurance recently because all of his rates went up after the first wave of mandates were implemented  How the hell is that more affordable? He works his ass off day in and day out to provide for his family and now he can't. He now depends on my mother's insurance to cover the costs of his extensive medical bills. He's recently had major surgery and may have to go back in to have surgery on his back. Crap, crap, crap.

The weather is going to be the death of me. I live in the desert, not on the coast, this humidity is NOT supposed to be here.

I just noticed that this post turned into a rant post. I'm sorry about that but it's truly what's been on my mind lately.